there was a point a few days ago, Thursday, when everything melded into one - I had just finished work, was off to Valletta to have my first real Platonic meeting with Miriam before she set off to Isle of MTV and I to pv - when the seams disappeared and I could leave life to itself and me to me.
It still hasn't worn off, and things seem more acessible. There's no voices breathing down my neck and my mind isn't running frustratingly faster to the world. Generally, I like it. I feel less hung up and less needy to prove myself. I just hope it isn't signaling mediocrity and stagnation.
Maybe I'm just getting more sleep (in spite of the heat, surprisingly) and not drinking as much coffee. Ever since I got back from London, it seems easier, even though I was late for work once. Maybe the island does it, it's OK to do that here.
I like the fact that Malta is small, at times, though everything else about it can be rather discouraging. It is indifferent, old, petrified and silent; whereas London I noticed to be man-made, man-run with a similar life-expectancy. overall though, I think I prefer the latter - I'd rather feel present - the mortality is more accessible, you can do more things while you're there, while Malta's infinitude isn't meant to be touched by humans.
There's very little going on most of the time, though I'm watching Shakespeare tonight if comps get through. At this stage I'd rather stay in and read Lodge (Therapy) but I'm sure I'll be OK once I get out.
a wave to anyone who reads, hope you're enjoying your summer.